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The Righteous Gemstones: The Funniest Scenes So Far

With Walton Goggins becoming the internet's newest man-crush following his turn as Cooper Howard/Ghoul in the Fallout TV series, fans are also ready for his return in The Righteous Gemstones.

Unfortunately, The Righteous Gemstones Season 4 doesn't premiere until later this year or early next year.

While we wait, we've rounded up some of the funniest scenes from The Righteous Gemstones to scratch that itch (and remind us of just how over-the-top this show can be!)

This is a show that pulls no punches. Everything is on the table, and nothing is off-limits.

The Righteous Gemstones finds its comedy footing by injecting hilarity into otherwise serious moments—a juxtaposition that tickles our funny bones and leaves us wanting more.

Some scenes have us belly-laughing while others have us covering our faces in secondhand embarrassment, but either way, this show knows funny.

Here are, in our humble opinion, the funniest scenes in The Righteous Gemstones so far.

There'll Come a Payday

We would be remiss if we didn't kick things off with one of Baby Billy's best moments: the song he covers in the opening scene of Season 3 Episode 3.

A cover of Red Sovine's 1978 gospel song "There'll Come a Payday" would otherwise be a slow, boring hymnal.

But Walton Goggins absolutely crushes it with his deep southern twang and Matthew McConaughey-esque whistle.

And let's talk about that outfit. A bright, sparkly teal suit, pink ruffled sleeves, and a giant, iridescent shell on his back? In the island heat?

Only Goggins could pull it off.

This scene perfectly encompasses The Righteous Gemstone's ability to poke fun at the overspending of some evangelical megachurches as Goggins wears this outrageous outfit and dances around the pool at the luxury Christian island resort Zion.

Baby Billy's Bible Bonkers

While we're at it, let's talk about another great Baby Billy scene.

After spending much of Season 3 pushing for a new game show and giving us the great tongue-twister "Baby Billy's Bible Bonkers," Baby Billy finally gets the green light to produce his show.

In the biblical Season 3 finale, Baby Billy pits the three Gemstone children against one another in a Bible trivia showdown, which is unceremoniously interrupted by a massive swarm of locusts.

We thought we'd seen it all on this show, but a Bible game show being shut down by a literal plague really takes the cake.

The apparent commentary on the sins of this megachurch family is not lost on us.

And it's made all the more hilarious by the images of giant locusts flying into the hair and clothes of the always-put-together Gemstones.

The Unknown Caller

Jesse Gemstone has a lot of funny scenes with his crew of friends, but this one might be the best one.

In this scene, Jesse has just confiscated the van of the man blackmailing him, so he gathers his friends to devise a game plan for handling the situation.

While trying to have a serious discussion about strategy, Jesse's phone rings loudly with a call from an unknown number.

He silences his phone and watches in shock as each person's phone begins ringing in turn -- all from an unknown caller.

It's obvious something is up, but what makes this scene so funny is Jesse's increasing anger with each call.

He's not mad at the caller -- which would actually make sense -- he's mad that no one silenced their phone. Never mind the fact that his own phone wasn't silenced either.

It's a double standard we see from Jesse regularly, in which he expects perfection from those around him while being himself a deeply flawed person.

And it never gets old.

"Why'd He Honk My Nose?"

Though his character is timid, BJ always steals every scene he's in.

This scene from Season 3 Episode 4 is another excellent example of The Righteous Gemstones dousing an intense scene with copious amounts of comedy.

In this scene, Eli's brother-in-law Peter, played perfectly by Steve Zahn, is threatening the Gemstones while they're gathered at a restaurant.

The family all have guns drawn -- some are wielding comedically small firearms.

However, everyone is too stunned to act, as Peter runs over to BJ of all people and honks his nose before exiting the building.

Like how you'd honk a child's nose while playing -- he even says, "Honk!"

BJ's shocked expression is all of us, as he stammers out, "Why'd he honk my nose?"

It's the icing on the cake for this outrageous and awkward scene, and you have to wonder how all these oddballs found each other.

Teenage Boys Will Be Teenage Boys

The Righteous Gemstones doesn't shy away from a little raunch...or a lot of it.

In this scene from Season 2 Episode 1, Jesse and his wife Amber awkwardly sit down with their oldest son Gideon to discuss the shenanigans of their younger son Abraham.

We've all probably had an uncomfortable conversation with a parent about bodily functions, and this one is made all the more uncomfortable by the fact that it's about someone else.

Jesse doesn't hold back in his raunchy description of Abraham's newfound exploration of his body in a way that results in his "crusty chones" being left all over the house, in places like the freezer (next to the Dreamsicles, no less!) and even in the family Bible.

Gideon's obvious discomfort mirrors our own, but we can't help laughing at Jesse's overly detailed diatribe and Amber's serious expression.

And, of course, we have to laugh at the totally hands-off parenting of Jesse and Amber.

The Full-Frontal Fight

Speaking of raunch, Season 3 Episode 6 gave us far more than we ever asked for.

In this scene, BJ confronts Stephen, the man Judy had an affair with, but finds Stephen in his house completely naked.

This doesn't deter him, and BJ goes in, brass knuckles swinging.

In a scene you won't want to watch next to your parents (or kids), BJ wrestles with a totally naked Stephen, and nothing is left to the imagination.

Once again, The Righteous Gemstones has taken a moment that should be serious—a heartbroken man confronting his wife's lover—and turned it on its head.

It's so unbelievably outrageous that we're left laughing, cringing, and covering our faces in shock.

BJ fights hard despite his opponent's complete nudity, and in an out-of-character moment, he actually wins.

We love to see it, but BJ's triumph is overshadowed by the absolutely unfiltered nakedness we've just endured over the last five minutes.

Kelvin Goes Goth

Kelvin Gemstone, played by Adam Devine, is known for his childish theatrics, which are always good for a chuckle.

Season 1 Episode 9 gave us a hilarious Kelvin moment as he decided to quit the youth group in his typical dramatic fashion.

Feeling adrift without Keefe by his side, Kelvin shows up to youth group in what can only be described as "Adam Lambert cosplay," eliciting a stunned silence from the kids and crew (and a hearty chuckle from yours truly).

The secondhand embarrassment is palpable, but Adam Devine plays it with a straight face and Kelvin's usual showmanship. We believe he's hurting, even as we laugh.

Ending the scene by gently knocking over the microphone stand and walking away in the squeakiest leather pants imaginable is the cherry on top of this funny moment.

Judy's Profane, Yet Heartfelt, Breakup Speech

Season 1 Episode 9 also gave us a great Judy scene that fully showcases her potty mouth.

There are so many funny things about this scene that we don't know where to start.

First, Judy's insistence that she and BJ meet at Outback Steakhouse as a "neutral location" hardly seems like an appropriate venue for a breakup.

Then, Judy hands BJ a pink velvet tote bag full of his belongings and, strangely enough, an unopened pack of printer paper.

The randomness of the velvet bag and its bizarre contents set this scene up as a sure-fire funny moment.

It only gets more hilarious as Judy launches into a long, sincere, profanity-laden speech about how she wants to break up because she's not good at relationships and she'd only had one boyfriend before BJ.

In graphic detail and filled with expletives, she describes the flip-flop-wearing professor she'd seduced in college while the heartfelt music swells in the background.

How the actress, Edi Patterson, got through this scene not only without laughing, but with earnest emotion, is a testament to the superb acting that turns what could be egregious filth into comedy gold.

Kelvin's God Squad

In Season 2, Kelvin puts together a group of muscular, perpetually shirtless men that he dubs the God Squad.

The God Squad performs in packed arenas, combining evangelicalism with strong-man-like competitions.

These scenes are filled with hearty helpings of toxic masculinity and undertones of homoeroticism (which comes to a head when Kelvin and Keefe finally become boyfriends in Season 3).

The men perform stunts while loud music blasts, lasers flash, and children look on in wonder.

The God Squad seems tailor-made as a commentary on some megachurches hosting similar events to draw in crowds.

This promo Kelvin made for the God Squad brings the funny right out of the gate, as Kelvin describes salvation as "10% inspiration and 99% perspiration."

Kelvin confidently delivers his lines, such as "Jesus' love of a beautiful body," while Keefe stumbles awkwardly over his lines like he's reading poorly from a teleprompter.

The Righteous Gemstones is known for its over-the-top situations and vulgar humor.

These scenes are just a taste of the madness packed into every episode, so let us know if we missed your favorite funny Gemstones moment!


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